What You See Is What You Get
about jun
about jun
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Join me in my life of a regular Singaporean. Where there is nothing to do but shop and eat.
I am a 25 year old fresh IT grad searching for a career in a highly competitive market. At the moment I spend most of my life in front of my laptop. The internet is my currency to the world while I have none to spare ($$$). Read my thoughts and opinion. My triumphs and my breakdowns. I do not seek to inspire or beg to be praised. Simply my honest takes and I am all there is. |
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Sunday, November 27, 2005
.::sigh::.
.::sigh::.
i want my hun's re-assuring, sincere hug now...
i promised him i'd sleep early when we spoke on the phone jz nw b4 he left wif MatRock to Johore
i was lying on my bed
he was wiping his new helmet
i was very sleepy, hyped with too much caffeine in the afternoon, which was consumed during the meeting at work, and a little irritable
irritable enough to make him feel my treatment and speech has been quite harsh, unloving and uncaring to him lately
he actually told me off like that
yes we're both very honest to each other
right down to every dirty little secret
all becoz we've sworn to share the rest of our lives with only each other
but then all the more the pressure from recent days sets in deeper
i had to rectify my mess so all the spontaneous appologies was begged for
sigh i feel abit lost and wrong at the same time
feel like im losing myself at the moment
a loss that i believe resulted from a series of my very own irresponsible actions
i hate to say this but i am a good girl
too good
even the smallest sin would be brought up by my very unfortunately strong conscience that seemed to have cemented into myself throughout these years
i am not a Minah Tudung
neither do i club
yes i do curse and swear...but with limitations
and nobody can make me lie to my mom
by now you would have had a much brighter picture of what my nature is like
to my darling...im so afraid you'd sometimes misunderstand me
i am naive and what you would say...a little "warak" [religious]
but it's who i am
everything that i portray is just me
but we just bond despite our differences
we are each other's blessing
he's recently had his heart shattered by the girl i used to think would be his ideal woman
but he still had me in some shy corner of his heart
to shorten the whole story we were brought together in the holy month
which makes us more thankful and convinced that this is for real
we're both twenty, no longer hormonally-challenged teens
more matured and settled in the head
well thats abit of late intro
jz felt i shd have done it earlier
anyway back to my first sentence...
...i nd his hug
bcoz i jz curiously truged into a forbidden place
risking my forgotten ego and uncontrollable jealousy
stubbornly read his ex's blog
why did i have to go there in this very insecure state of mind im in
you're so stupid Jun!
i promised him i'd sleep early when we spoke on the phone jz nw b4 he left wif MatRock to Johore
i was lying on my bed
he was wiping his new helmet
i was very sleepy, hyped with too much caffeine in the afternoon, which was consumed during the meeting at work, and a little irritable
irritable enough to make him feel my treatment and speech has been quite harsh, unloving and uncaring to him lately
he actually told me off like that
yes we're both very honest to each other
right down to every dirty little secret
all becoz we've sworn to share the rest of our lives with only each other
but then all the more the pressure from recent days sets in deeper
i had to rectify my mess so all the spontaneous appologies was begged for
sigh i feel abit lost and wrong at the same time
feel like im losing myself at the moment
a loss that i believe resulted from a series of my very own irresponsible actions
i hate to say this but i am a good girl
too good
even the smallest sin would be brought up by my very unfortunately strong conscience that seemed to have cemented into myself throughout these years
i am not a Minah Tudung
neither do i club
yes i do curse and swear...but with limitations
and nobody can make me lie to my mom
by now you would have had a much brighter picture of what my nature is like
to my darling...im so afraid you'd sometimes misunderstand me
i am naive and what you would say...a little "warak" [religious]
but it's who i am
everything that i portray is just me
but we just bond despite our differences
we are each other's blessing
he's recently had his heart shattered by the girl i used to think would be his ideal woman
but he still had me in some shy corner of his heart
to shorten the whole story we were brought together in the holy month
which makes us more thankful and convinced that this is for real
we're both twenty, no longer hormonally-challenged teens
more matured and settled in the head
well thats abit of late intro
jz felt i shd have done it earlier
anyway back to my first sentence...
...i nd his hug
bcoz i jz curiously truged into a forbidden place
risking my forgotten ego and uncontrollable jealousy
stubbornly read his ex's blog
why did i have to go there in this very insecure state of mind im in
you're so stupid Jun!
posted at 12:33 AM